What to Do When Your Name is Stolen
First-time mama Emily wrote in asking for advice naming their first child, a son. “We were originally going with Theodore Michael [Last name] but my husband's cousin (same last name) just named his son Theodore. We're considering still keeping it, but we're conflicted.Other names we are considering are Sebastian and Dominic (although we made the mistake of telling my mom and she said she ‘hates’ Dominic).” What a conundrum! It’s so hard when you’ve set your heart on a name, just to have it used by close family. Now, if the boys had different last names, I’d say this isn’t a problem at all and to use Theodore still with no reservations; however, since the boys will have the same last name, that makes this a little more difficult.
Here is what Theresa Zoe came up with for them.
Thoughts on the names they already like.
Theodore: I really love this one for them but I do think it would be confusing to have two Theodore [Last Name}s. Unless they rarely see this other family, I would try to stay away from this name. However, if they rarely see them or have their son go by a different nickname than the other son, then the problem is probably moot. I'm such a toss up on this one because they like it for all the right reasons and it was kind of just swept out from under them.
Oliver: Very popular, but that doesn't seem to bother them. I like it and it reminds me of Theodore but I feel like it's even less original. There's just so many right now! But, it's popular for a reason: it's an excellent name. Personally, I'm particularly fond of nickname Ollie. Maybe they'd like Oscar instead? Same feel but less popular and St. Oscar Romero is baller. Emily’s mom might say something like "Oh, Oscar the grouch. Where's he gonna live? In a trash can?" but then they can regale her with stories of the saint.
Carlo: Getting right in on the newness of this one! If Carlo is too Italian for them, it's just a form of Charles, which I feel like they'd like better. There are also many international versions, including Karl, Carl. Karol, and Carlos.
Dominic: Personally, I love this name, but I'm also Italian. I've never thought of it as "too Italian" but I asked my husband (not Italian) and he said it does read very Italian. Now the problem of the grandmother. Grandparents tend to have very strong feelings about names...up until the child is born. They may hate a name, but love the child so the name grows on them. Other ways to lessen the blow are to go by a nickname. Dom is the obvious choice but I love unexpected Nic or Nico! All this to say, don't worry too much about what grandparents say; they'll come around. But if they still need something different, maybe Donovan or Damien?
Sebastian: Another great, strong, masculine name. I love that this comes with nicknames Seb, Sebby, Bastian, and Bash. Something for everyone in this name! Which is similar to how they thought of Theodore. This one reads very international, so they'd cover a lot of bases with this name and that flexibility might be just what they're looking for [husband is Italian but Emily is not and is a mix of other European heritages].
On to new names! It was really hard to narrow it down to just five.
Thaddeus: Theodore always makes me think of this name because they possibly have the same root and have similar sounds. Thaddeus means "heart, breast" or "gift of God", giving it a strong meaning to bank on. And, of course, there's St. Jude Thaddeus the Apostle as patron. He's come through for me many times in my life, but my husband doesn't like either name (whomp whomp). Maybe it appeals to them? It's way less popular than Theodore at #897 in the US overall and not ranking in New York at all. Nicknames include T(h)ad and Tadpole and I think those are super cute and fun. Tadpole when he's young and then growing into T(h)ad. I love that this is a name to grow with the child. Thaddeus Michael really grounds it and brings it strength.
Vincent: Vincent reminds me of Dominic in that a lot of Italians seem to use it but it's not overtly or over-the-top Italian sounding (Vincenzo on the other hand...). It means "to conquer" and there are many saints to go along with it. It's strong, masculine, and has many nicknames to go with it: Vin, Vinny, Vinnie, Vince. If they're into baseball at all, legendary Dodgers announcer Vin Scully was a devout Catholic. It ranks at #120 in the US and #76 in New York, so not super popular but not unheard of. I think that's probably their sweet spot. Vincent Michael is strong, ambiguously international, and masculine like they're fond of. This is probably my top suggestion for them.
Tobias: Theodore made me think of this name, too, and its biblical roots. It means "Yahweh is good" which is so sweet for a first child. The book of Tobit, in which Tobias is featured, is such an amazing story and a really great model for a child. I love that he has interactions with Raphael the Archangel, too. Nickname Toby is sweet, fun, and accessible. It ranks at #280 in the US and not at all in New York. Tobias Michael reads a little softer than other choices, but it's not un-masculine, just highlights a different side of masculinity. Tobias Michael [last name] is very lilting to my ears.
Matthias: This name is a form of Matthew (and related names). Matthias is the apostle who was voted in to replace Judas and set the precedent for apostolic succession. I like this rarer form of Matthew, it gives it pizzazz but not too much, helps him stand out but not be weird. And nicknames Matt and Matty make it accessible. Like all forms of Matthew, it means "gift of Yahweh" which is so sweet. Matthias ranks at #483 in the US and not at all in New York, although several other forms of Matthew do rank in the New York top 100. Matthias Michael [last name] is so strong and masculine and traditional sounding. I really love it! I like that Matthias makes him standout but Matt and Michael ground him. Great combo.
Lucian: This name came up as a match for some of the names they like and I thought it was just crazy enough to include. This one is the "stretch" name-- I think this name challenges them to open their perspective but it may not be their cup of tea (which is fine! We have certain cups of tea for a reason!). It means "light" and is ranked at #487 in the US and not at all in New York, although nicknames Luke and Luca do rank in the New York top 100 (I believe). There is a St. Lucian the Presbyter who was martyred in 1243 and his feast day is October 15. I like that this name is a little different from their other likes, a little less stuffy but no less strong and masculine. Lucian Michael [last name] is incredible! This is my second choice for them. I love that they have versatility with this name, too, but that Lucian sounds like he could be a doctor or a poet or a president! I really love this one.
After these initial suggestions, Emily and her husband asked for a few more ideas. Hope chimed in with these incredible ideas.
AUGUSTINE - Latin for "Magnificent".
I love the way it sounds with Michael, and the meaning would be, "magnificent who is like God"! Pretty cool powerhouse of a meaning! Amazing Saint! They could keep the e or drop the e either way. Just like Theodore they have nickname options: Auggie, August, Gus.
BENEDICT - Latin for "Blessed". A great saint, easy nickname options of Ben, Benny or Bennett. Sounds great with Michael. Same powerhouse of a meaning of "blessed who is like God".
MATTEO - Italian for Matthew "gift of God", same meaning as Theodore. It's kind of like Sebastian where it can be International, but it's not unheard of or difficult to pronounce it all. The double M with Matteo Michael sounds fine because they have different number of syllables. They have the nickname options of Matt, Matty, and Teo, close enough to Theo. Great Bible name, super solid, masculine etc.
SOLOMON - Hebrew for "peaceable". David's son who became a king known for his reign of peace and prosperity and known for his wisdom and discernment. David told his son, "Be strong, be courageous, and keep the charge of the Lord your God"; that would be such a cool scripture to put on a sign near his crib or something! Nickname options: Solly, Sully, or Sonny! Very cute!
If they like those a nickname options may I also suggest SOLANUS (Bl. Solanus Casey I believe had his first assignment and Yonkers, New York City)? The same nicknames could definitely apply, and I thought it might kind of have the same style with Madeleva [their girl pick] with a sister someday maybe. Unique saint names with easy, accessible nicknames.
JASPER - “Bringer of treasure”. I know this one doesn't have a whole lot of nickname options; the only one I can think of is "Jazz". It doesn't scream Catholic, but it is a version of Caspar, one of the three Magi. Theresa Zoe told me that there is a Saint Gaspar [del Bufalo] as well, which is another version of Caspar and I'm pretty sure she said he was Italian [he is] It's classic, old fashioned, unique, cool, confident, but not difficult to spell or pronounce. Jasper Michael sounds good together. There's also a scripture in Revelation that says ,"Heaven shown like a jasper stone!"
Bonus!: not totally in line with their style, but had to add it in here anyway...
PETER, GEORGE, PETER-GEORGE -
I just had to throw this out there, Pier -Giorgio Frassati will be canonized this year! He's italian, he's a real "man's man", and he's a great saint for boys and men to look up to! He preferred being called Giorgio. The English version would be Peter-George. They could do Peter, they could do George, they could do both. Petey and Georgie are such cute little boy names and they grow seamlessly into manhood. Peter Michael, George Michael, Peter-George Michael, they all sound so solid like somebody you can really depend on, which he was!
What do you think of these suggestions? What else would you suggest for mama Emily with middle name Michael? Is having same-named cousins really that big of a deal? You tell us!
